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The Know-it-All Stage

The Good, the Bad and How to Keep Your Sanity

By Shannon McKelden

Remember that limits and boundaries will be different with every child. "To avoid the pointless debates, I tried everything," Pollero says. "Time out, loss of toys/electronics/computer time, etc. Nothing worked." Until she discovered that working on the "fine system" worked for her and her daughter.

"We introduced the rule with one warning [from me] – 'I will not argue this point with you. Stop now or it will cost you X"," Pollero says. This fine was usually a dollar (or higher, depending on the attitude, which definitely drives up the level of parental frustration). "Now, a month later, no more warnings," she says, "The rule is in place and she now knows it is a rule."

LaRowe suggests parents also lead by example. "It's so important to model desirable behavior," she says. "The way you interact with others, your spouse and your child all provide natural learning moments."

LaRowe encourages parents to be cautious in their communication. "Keep your cool, and if you are feeling frustrated, talk to your child in a calm but firm manner," she says. "[For instance] 'I know you are frustrated when I tell you something you believe you already know because I went through that too when I was young. I am frustrated that you don't want my help. We are both learning, so let's try to be patient and work together.' And then move forward in that patience."