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Puberty Primer
What to Expect and
When to Expect It
When to Expect It
By Valerie K. O'Berry
Lucille Dust of Munster, Ind., looks back at her children's preteen years with a smile that can only come from experience. As the mother of three grown children – including one particularly rebellious teen – she says she recalls those years well.
"With all my kids, [problems] started at about age 10," she says. "I remember I took my 10-year-old daughter on vacation with me – she hated it. All she talked about was wanting to get back and be with her friends."
Sandra Narron of Largo, Fla., the mother of three teenagers aged 15 to 19, had a different experience. Her kids didn't rebel. But when they each turned 10, she noticed that the phone receiver appeared to be growing out of their ears.
"They were on the phone all the time, making call waiting a necessity," she says. "The line was always tied up all night. I never got to talk to anyone."
Typical preteen behavior? Absolutely, say experts.
"As kids develop, they start to become their own person. Psychologically, they become somewhat independent, beginning to realize that they can live without their parents," says Christine Nicholson, Ph.D., a child psychologist in private practice in Albuquerque, N.M. "This is a healthy thrust, but for the parent, who is no longer in control, it can cause conflict."
The preteen or pre-adolescent period will, on average, begin in girls between the ages of 8 and 11 and in boys approximately two years later. The first physical changes appear in girls in the form of developing breasts and in boys as voice changes (although other, not-so-apparent-to-you physical changes have probably already occurred in boys, including enlargement of the testes).
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