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Beginning Our Search
A New Logic of Girls' Lives
An excerpt from the book The Wonder of Girls: Understanding the Hidden Nature of Our Daughters
By Michael Gurian
My disquiet, my irritation, even my hidden anger were replaced now by 
admiration. As so often happens in the world of children, something small was really something large. The kids were living out their nature wholeheartedly, and it was worth a lot to observe it at work.
A Moment of Awakening
This moment at the park was the first of many incidents that cried out for me to think beyond our culture's present ideas about girls, about girls and boys, and about women and men. If you think about it, how many times have similar things happened on playgrounds, in workplaces, in homes, among children, teenagers, adults? Initially, there is overwhelming energy from males, but soon, gradual assessment, then guidance, from females. As a married man, I am no stranger to this circumstance! And in the five minutes of negotiation that went on between Gabrielle, Davita and the two boys, I realized I needed to revise the timeline by which I watched for drops in girls' self-esteem. Among these four children there was no drop in self-esteem, though initial observation seemed to show there was a sad drop for my girls. Instead, there were the natural interpersonal relationships that emerge when we are patient enough to observe them.
