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Home › Articles › Holiday: Winter › How Do I Love Thee?

How Do I Love Thee?

7 Ways to Say "I Love You" to Your Child This Valentine's Day

By Dr. Stu

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When a child feels frustrated or unhappy, lend a sympathetic ear. "Tell me how you feel" is so much better than "What's wrong with you?". "I know how you feel" is equally wrong. And "Get a grip!" is awful.

5. Quit smoking
If you smoke, nothing says, "I love you and want to stick around and watch you grow up!" like resolving to quit and doing so. Hopefully, you stopped smoking during pregnancy, but I have seen new mothers nursing babies with cigarettes dangling from their mouths. The incidence of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), bronchitis, asthma and the risk of accidental fire all vastly diminish when there is no smoking in the home. And you'll be more likely to be around when your children have children. Set a good example regarding not only tobacco but drugs and alcohol.

6. Give your child a hug.
Noted philosopher Virginia Satir said, "Everyone needs a hug a day to feel loved and content with themselves. We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth." I believe that. Hug your child, often.

7. Just say it!
"I love you" is so important to say to a child of any age, not just to a spouse. As Vicki Lansky, author of 101 Ways to Tell Your Child "I Love You" (McGraw-Hill/Contemporary Books, 1988) says, "Let your children know how special it is to be their parent by saying 'I love being your mom,' 'I love being your dad' or 'I love you for making my life wonderful'."

Happy Valentine's Day!


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