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Home › Articles › Parenting Strategies › Watching the Clock

Watching the Clock

Negotiate and Enforce Curfews

By Carma Haley Shoemaker

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Rather than acting emotionally, parents can employ the consequences they all originally agreed upon, he says.

"It's not easy trying to compromise with teens," says Carrie Eichler, a nurse and mother of three from Ashland, Ohio. "My oldest son wants more independence, but then when he realizes that more responsibilities come with it, often changes his mind. Finding an easy way to set guidelines – like curfews, rules, phone and computer times – would be wonderful. I would be willing to allow him input. After all, the rules and guidelines will affect him."

Setting the Time

Actual time guidelines depend upon the teens themselves. If a child is more acceptable to rules and responsibilities, they may be able to handle the responsibility of a later curfew – such as 11 p.m. or midnight. However, a teen who avoids responsibility or who has a history of "getting in trouble" may require an earlier curfew to prevent any further incidents and to offer evidence – to both parents and themselves – that they are capable of handling the extra responsibility.

"Teens mature at different rates," Chapman says. "Parents know their teens best and should use their best judgment insetting time guidelines. However, teens should be involved in the final decision and should be allowed to 'speak their case' before a final decision is made."


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