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Top Issues for Tweens
How to Keep Your Preteen Healthy By Kendeyl Johansen
Parents don't look forward to frank conversations about sex and drugs with tweens, but straight talk is essential. "Illicit drugs are readily available to our youth in America," says Dr. Franchek-Roa. "Talking to your children about drugs at a younger age enables them to be prepared in a situation where they may experience peer pressure to do something that they do not want to do."
Dr. Franchek-Roa recommends talking through different scenarios and asking your child how situations could be handled. "Preteens are still concrete thinkers and do not have the ability to abstract generalized rules to specific situations," she says.
Shannon Tilley, a Gilbert, Ariz., mom of six (including 9-year-old Jayce and 12-year-old Braden) discusses "what if..." situations with her kids. "We get really specific, and after the kids respond, we add to the story to make it more challenging," she says.
For example Tilley might ask her kids, "What if your friend tries to get you to smoke or try drugs at school?" The kids respond with, "I would say no." Tilley then asks, "What if someone offered you money to try something? What if your friend said he wouldn't tell anyone? What if he said once wouldn't hurt and if you did it he would stop bugging you?"
Discussions about sex and body changes are also important. Yes, school curriculum covers puberty and sex, but your child needs frank conversations with you now to feel comfortable discussing questions and issues later.
"As preteen bodies mature, so does a child's ability to make mature decisions if properly nurtured," says Dr. Franchek-Roa. "However, in many cases bodies mature at a faster rate than children's minds do. It is important for children to know what is and is not OK."
Finally, don't be surprised if a physician wants to talk with your child alone. High-risk behavior can impact teen health, and it's important for tweens and physicians to talk openly.