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Sexual Abuse
How to Prevent It
By Julia Rosien
Parents make mistakes. Acknowledge them and focus on fixing the problem. Actions influence children more than talk. "They get to see me as a whole person and not just their Mom. Imperfect," Cameron says. Too often children see their parents as infallible, and when they make a bad choice, they feel no one will understand.
Frequently, molestation begins when an offender touches a child on the shoulder or back before moving to more intimate areas. If this contact makes a child feel uncomfortable, he needs to share his feelings with a teacher, counselor, nurse or parent. It may be innocent, but if your child is uncomfortable, he needs to know you will listen.
Hughes counsels children once they disclose abuse and prepares them for court, guiding them through the witness program. Her experiences have taught her that many children see the world as "us against them." They feel their parents don't understand what it's like to be a kid.
School counselor and mother of two boys Carol Jacobs agrees with Hughes. She talks to many children who won't tell Mom and Dad because "they don't understand." Parents need to talk openly about sex and be honest when asked uestions. "Don't give them cutesy answers or half the story," Jacobs says. "If they're asking, tell them what they want to know."